OrderingFamilies,Neighborhoods,andCities 145
sometimes making it explicit that the ‘‘gender-neutral’’ language of their
laws also applied to men.^18 Marriage made families; it founded the society;
it was everyone’s business.
The first public step to marriage was betrothal. When Ezzelino da Ro-
mano betrothed Salvaza, the daughter of the emperor Frederick II, in 1238 ,
the ceremony was conducted on Pentecost Sunday before the doors of the
great church of San Zeno at Verona.^19 More commonly, the ceremony was
held, and the promises to marry sealed, at the house of the bride. The groom
came in procession with his father, brothers, male relatives, and retainers.
The principals, father and son, came on horseback in all their finery; the
others walked. Powerful and wealthy families demonstrated their importance
by the size and splendor of the procession. At the woman’s house, her female
friends and relatives assembled in equally impressive numbers to welcome
her future husband. In the later 1200 s, cities restricted these displays, usually
limiting the men’s and women’s parties to twenty members each, a rule that
probably applied only to guests who were not blood relatives.^20 The betrothal
might last for years, but sometimes only months, before the marriage itself
occurred. Some parents betrothed their children under the legal age of mar-
riage. Some even betrothed infants in the cradle. Ecclesiastical law prohib-
ited infant betrothals, but parents replaced the ‘‘betrothal’’ with a contract
to betroth their children at some future date, usually when the children had
both reached the age of seven, the legal age for betrothals.
The canons required that those betrothed before puberty be given free-
dom to ratify or reject the union when they reached maturity (twelve for a
girl, fourteen for a boy), but fathers and mothers had their own means of
persuasion.^21 At least in theory, the actual wedding had to wait until the
couple were old enough to act for themselves. This ceremony, like the be-
trothal, included a grand procession, but now the focus of attention was on
the bride, not the groom. Marriage was the one occasion when thirteenth-
century Italians delighted in having their women make a public show of
themselves. The bride’s elegance and manner reflected on the family’s
status.^22 At least until sumptuary legislation tried to put a stop to it, the
bride’s hair was elaborately dressed on this day, the last time it would be
- Verona Stat.i( 1228 ), 115 ,p. 89 ; Vicenza Stat. ( 1264 ), 196 (specifically applies to men); Verona
Stat.ii( 1276 ), 3. 57 – 59 , pp. 425 – 28 ; Bologna Stat.ii( 1288 ), 4. 30 , 1 : 195 ; Mantua Stat. ( 1303 ), 1. 24 – 25 ,
2 : 78 – 79 ; Brescia Stat. ( 1313 ), 2. 77 , col. 86 ; Lucca Synod ( 1308 ), 43 , pp. 184 – 85 (contraceptive magic and
abortion); Modena Stat. ( 1327 ), 4. 27 , pp. 397 – 98. - Parisio of Cerea,Annales,ed. Philippus Jaffe ́( 1238 ),MGH.SS 19 : 10 – 11. On marriage ‘‘at the church
door’’ in France and England, see Brooke,Medieval Idea, 248 – 57. - Reggio Stat. ( 1242 ), 55 ,p. 34 (imposes a limit of ten); Ferrara Stat. ( 1287 ), 6. 76 ,p. 399 ; Bologna
Stat.ii( 1288 ), 4. 94 – 95 , 1 : 251 – 51 (also fines ‘‘uninvited’’ guests); Modena Stat. ( 1327 ), 4. 28 ,p. 399 (imposes
a limit of twelve). On sumptuary legislation for weddings at Bologna, see Lodovico Frati,La vita privata di
Bologna nel sec.xiiialxviiicon appendice di documenti inediti(Bologna: Zanichelli, 1900 ), 49 – 50. - Gratian,Decretum,C. 30 q. 2 ;X 4. 2.
- On weddings and sumptuary law, see Catherine Kovesi Killerby,Sumptuary Law in Italy, 1200 – 1500
(Oxford: Clarendon Press, 2002 ), 66 – 71.