I Can Read You Like a Book : How to Spot the Messages and Emotions People Are Really Sending With Their Body Language

(Frankie) #1

Gesturing, With or Without Intent 121


Barriers


Barriers show you are uncomfortable with a threat. People
find scores of ways to block out the offender. Here are some
examples, although I want to point out that doing one of these things
doesn’t necessarily make it a barrier. Context is all-important.


ƒ Standing behind a table.
ƒ Crossing your arms.
ƒ Turning sideways while in conversation.
ƒ Putting your purse or briefcase between you and other
person.
ƒ Lowering your eyelids during conversation.
ƒ Putting your arm on a table between you and the
person next to you.
ƒ Holding up reading materials.
As I noted in Chapter 3, a common protective gesture men use
is to barrier the genitals by crossing their hands. Watch men on TV
game shows who are unaccustomed to making public appearances.
Even though some of them are behind a podium, you will see their
hands down in a fig-leaf position—that’s a double barrier. It’s a
natural movement for men to cover their genitals when they are
under any kind of stress.
One of the news stories of 2005 involved a monkey who
attacked a California man who had brought a birthday cake to the
animal sanctuary for another monkey. Feeling threatened—

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