I Can Read You Like a Book : How to Spot the Messages and Emotions People Are Really Sending With Their Body Language

(Frankie) #1
E The Holistic View 161

people send. Rather than that quick-fix approach to reading body
language, I’ve helped you develop an eye for reviewing the pieces
of body language and speculating about what they could mean. You
have practiced your review skills to the point that you can now see
similarities and differences. And you understand that sometimes
people scratch their nose because it itches.
Using the holistic approach with those basics to better under-
stand the overall person now allows you to create categories of
moods. The large-chunk pieces allow you to overlay the smaller,
subtler actions you’ve examined and to notice what stands out.
When your eyes notice a nuance that has more meaning than the
collection of individual actions, you have reached the “E” in R.E.A.D.


So now, I want you to start the evaluation process. You will
move from “What is in the picture from scalp to sole?” to “What is
in the picture from scalp to sole that is unusual or telling?” And
“How can I know its true meaning?”


Example


I have a project that is falling behind, but I manage to keep my
fingers in the dam to prevent catastrophe. I watch the boss come in
Friday morning. He walks intently, his gait faster than normal. As
he approaches the office, he is holding his coffee with both hands
and only releases to rub his forehead once. His overall movement
is contained, but there is a nervous energy—choppier than normal.
As he passes my door, he glances at his shoes. Should I be
concerned? If so, why?

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