Filters: Sex and Other Misconceptions 183
could be characterized by the word “tame,” but she thought one of
them might have a little more action than others. Never having
been there, we wondered how she arrived at that conclusion.
Rumors. Hearsay. I had a feeling that a trip to one of the bars
would help me demonstrate the effects of projection, especially
how it interferes with a real understanding of body language.
Maryann’s friend took one look at the waitress and thought she
had her pegged. She read the tattoo, suggestive top, and sexy walk
as signs of a certain kind of person. A very different person came
over to meet us, however. The tattoo was of her children’s names
interlaced around her arm. Up close, the top looked more like a
good choice for a hot summer day than part of a come-hither ward-
robe. And I would not have called her walk sexy; that’s a descrip-
tor coming from someone who projected that an attractive woman
with a tattoo and halter top would have a sexy walk. An accurate
interpretation of the woman’s
body language would use words
such as open, vulnerable, and
attentive.
What is the ape in this photo
doing?
(a) He’s sucking his thumb to
reduce stress.
(b) He’s trying to tell you he has
a toothache.
(c) He has his thumb in his
mouth.