wondering or if it is plausible that you could bewondering or
might choose to, then it nudges you down that route. Mind-
reading occurs when you act or speak as if you know the other
person’s internal experience. As with all the other patterns this
can be helpful and an enriching experience or it can be
patronising and disruptive. (And rather than presuppose that
these are the only two effects it can have, you can also think
what other possibilities there are!)
Some examples of mind-reading:
❏ You are probably asking yourself what you can do about this.
❏ I expect you will have an answer.
❏ I know what you will say if I tell you.
❏ Your next step is predictable.
❏ You might be thinking what your outcome might be.
I remember a car journey into London with a colleague. It was
as if this colleague had just been waiting for the opportunity to
tell me (without interruption) what they had on their mind. The
conversation took the form of her telling me for most of the
journey what I should do with the opportunities I had and with
the business and what I must do for myself. The effect of this
mind-reading and the powerful language of shoulds and musts
was that I felt as if I was under fire. I was mentally exhausted and
very relieved when we got to our destination!
It is important for us to be aware of hypnotic language patterns.
With this awareness we can choose the patterns we use with
others and ideally choose those that most support us in
achieving our mutual outcomes. With this awareness we can
also be aware of what is not working and precisely select
alternative ways of meeting our own and others’ needs.
HYPNOTIC LANGUAGE 121SUMMARY