Watch a player take a goal kick in rugby. If you are lucky, the
camera will show how the player prepares his thinking. I have
just watched Johnny Wilkinson playing for England against
France in the Six Nations Rugby Union Cup. The camera zoomed
in on his face as he prepared the kick. He looked at the ball and
then tracked the trajectory that he wanted the ball to take up
and through the goal posts. He repeated this three times, then
very quickly, almost without looking this final time, kicked the
ball. Every goal he kicked, he converted.
Sometimes people say to me, “Won’t I get disappointed if I
imagine what I really want and then I don’t get it?” I have found
that those people who consistently achieve what they really
want, often against the odds, also hold a belief that whatever
happens is learning. In this way they are happy with the journey
toward the goals as much if not more than arriving at the
destination. This outcome way of thinking is a way of influencing
the way we journey through life.
It is likely that you will want your outcome in some situations
but not others. For example, if you want a feeling of certainty
and self-confidence, this could be very appropriate when
giving a presentation or planning your future, but
inappropriate in a situation where you had some partly formed
ideas and wanted your colleagues to develop their own
thinking about these ideas.
So ensure that you put your outcome into context. Where,
when, and with whom do you want your outcome?
If your outcome does depend on someone or something
else, sometimes this can be the painful part. Can you let go of
that need to have someone or something else change? Once
you can, then in a strange way you increase the chances that
you can have what you really want.
Outcomes that are sustainable over time are ones that are not
only a win for the person setting them but also a win for the
key others in their life. These key others might be family
members and partners. They might be colleagues and other
employees. They might increasingly be suppliers and
competitors. If the outcome is a win for the bigger system,
ACHIEVE WHAT YOU REALLY WANT: WELL-FORMED OUTCOMES 275Whatever happens is learningPUT IT IN CONTEXT
Can you let go of the need to
have someone or something
else change?