people, especially those at the head of the organization, to
receive feedback constructively and openly. And then to learn
how to give it in a way that strengthens the team and the
relationships within it and subsequently encourages improved
performance of both the individuals and the business.
There are many books and business models that talk of
continuous learning and development, learning organizations,
appraisal systems, double loop learning, and much much
more. If we are to be able to achieve any of these then we must
first be able to receive and give feedback. Once we can do this
we will be contributing to business in a way that offers learning
from all people and all circumstances.
The ability to give and receive feedback is essential to the
process of modeling. When we model someone (let’s say
someone other than ourselves for the moment) we are studying
the structure both of what they do and how they do it. To do this
without contaminating that structure, we need to be able to
accept what they do in exactlythe way they do it right now.
On one of my NLP training sessions we invited someone we
considered to be a model of excellence for leadership to be
modeled by the delegates on the program. He was someone
who had led a program of immense change in a manufacturing
company that had to close half its production sites. This meant
he had to find a way to cut the workforce at one plant by 2,000
people. What was special about this man was that he had done
this in a way that gained the support and respect of the
employees involved. He had managed an immense cutback and
had done so with compassion and support for everyone
involved. However, he also realized that there were aspects of
this whole process that he could have handled differently if he
had to do it again (which he sincerely prayed would never have
to happen). During the modeling process one of the delegates
started to offer some thoughts along the lines of “What if you
had done it this way?” and “Had you thought that maybe you
might have or still could...?”
The ability to give and receive
feedback is essential in
modelingGIVING AND RECEIVING FEEDBACK 337