Me 213integrate self-image, feelings, confidence, and beliefs about themselves.
Hmmm. Is there any book on popular psychology today which does not
deal with this topic? Just put together some combination of the previous
words and you come up with a plausible title for a self-help book: “How to
Feel Good about Yourself,” “Gaining Confidence in your Feelings,”
“Forming a Healthy Self-image,” “Believing in Yourself,” “Self-
Confidence through Positive Thinking,” and so on.
So what is the relationship between these different words? I suggest
that we already know the answer. We only need to put together the various
pieces which we have developed thus far. Let us look at what we know and
see how it relates to me, belief, confidence and self-image.
First, notice that self-image and me both involve the internal world of
thought, with me residing within the inner world of Mercy experiences and
self-image in the internal world of Perceiver beliefs. Second, since Mercy
experiences with the strongest emotions force their way into the internal
world of identification, we would expect me and feelings to be strongly
related.
Third, we know that facts enter the Perceiver internal world through the
step of belief. Therefore, the relationship between the internal worlds of
Perceiver and Mercy thought will express itself as an interaction between
belief and me. Perceiver beliefs which are formed about me will form the
basis of my self-image. Fourth, we have learned that Perceiver beliefs can
only survive if they have sufficient confidence to handle emotional
pressure without falling apart. Logically speaking, the level of Perceiver
confidence which Perceiver strategy has about the facts which describe me
will determine my self-confidence. If the level of emotions associated with
me rises too high, then Perceiver strategy will begin to experience doubts
about me.A
Feeling Good about Myself
How do I gain self-confidence? Simple. I gain self-confidence in
exactly the same way that I learn Perceiver confidence in any other area: I
enter an emotionally charged situation and I hold on to the facts. If the
facts about me survive, then self-confidence grows. If the facts about me
A This is only a partial definition. Here, self-confidence describes an
individual‟s Perceiver ability to know himself accurately. Normally, when
people think about self-confidence, they are referring to Contributor
strategy—the ability to plan and to act in the middle of emotional conflict.
We will see later that Contributor confidence is built upon an assumed
foundation of Perceiver and Server confidence and that if either Perceiver
or Server thought experiences doubts about self, then Contributor self-
confidence will also falter.