eternal marriage

ABUSE

SELECTED TEACHINGS

Abuse Defined

“Abuse is the physical, emotional, sexual, or spiritual
mistreatment of others. It may not only harm the
body, but it can deeply affect the mind and spirit,
destroying faith and causing confusion, doubt,
mistrust, guilt, and fear” (Responding to Abuse: Helps
for Ecclesiastical Leaders,1).

President Gordon B. Hinckley

“I have in my office a file of letters received from
women who cry out over the treatment they receive
from their husbands in their homes. They tell of
the activity of some of these men in Church
responsibilities. They even speak of men holding
temple recommends. And they speak of abuse, both
subtle and open. They tell of husbands who lose
their tempers and shout at their wives and children.
They tell of men who demand offensive intimate
relations. They tell of men who demean them and
put them down and of fathers who seem to know
little of the meaning of patience and forbearance
with reference to their children” (in Conference
Report, Apr. 1990, 68; or Ensign,May 1990, 52).

Elder James E. Faust

“Any form of physical or mental abuse to any woman
is not worthy of any priesthood holder.... This, of
course, means verbal as well as physical abuse” (in
Conference Report, Apr. 1988, 44; or Ensign,May
1988, 37).

Policy toward Abuse

President Ezra Taft Benson

“A priesthood holder who would curse his wife, abuse
her with words or actions, or do the same to one of
his own children is guilty of grievous sin.

“‘Can ye be angry, and not sin?’ asked the Apostle

Paul (Joseph Smith Translation, Ephesians 4:26)”

(in Conference Report, Oct. 1983, 61–62; or Ensign,

Nov. 1983, 42).

“If a man does not control his temper, it is a sad

admission that he is not in control of his thoughts.

He then becomes a victim of his own passions and

emotions, which lead him to actions that are totally

unfit for civilized behavior, let alone behavior for a

priesthood holder” (in Conference Report, Oct.

1986, 62; or Ensign,Nov. 1986, 47).

“What does it mean to love someone with all our

hearts? It means with all our emotional feelings and

our devotion. Surely when you love your wife with

all your heart, you cannot demean her, criticize her,

find fault with her, nor abuse her by words, sullen

behavior, or actions” (in Conference Report, Oct.

1983, 63; or Ensign,Nov. 1983, 43).

President Howard W. Hunter

“Any man who abuses or demeans his wife physically

or spiritually is guilty of grievous sin and in need

of sincere and serious repentance” (in Conference

Report, Oct. 1994, 64; or Ensign,Nov. 1994, 51).

President Gordon B. Hinckley

“Question 6: What about spouse and child abuse?...

“We are doing all we know how to do to stamp out

this terrible evil. When there is recognition of equality

between the husband and the wife, when there is

acknowledgment that each child born into the world

is a child of God, then there will follow a greater sense

of responsibility to nurture, to help, to love with an

enduring love those for whom we are responsible.

“No man who abuses his wife or children is worthy

to hold the priesthood of God. No man who abuses

his wife or children is worthy to be a member in

good standing in this Church. The abuse of one’s

spouse and children is a most serious offense before

God, and any who indulge in it may expect to be

disciplined by the Church” (in Conference Report,

Oct. 1998, 92–93; or Ensign,Nov. 1998, 72).

Causes of Abuse

President Ezra Taft Benson

“Another face of pride is contention. Arguments,

fights, unrighteous dominion, generation gaps,

divorces, spouse abuse, riots, and disturbances all

Abuse is the physical,

emotional, sexual, or spiritual

mistreatment of others.

—Responding to Abuse

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