A Better Understanding of Self
Your experience with family,likely,has
been“from the inside”as a son or
daughter,husband or wife.This
understanding is deeply enmeshed in
emotions such as love,hate,jealousy,joy,
and bitterness.Some of your most intense
emotions occur within the context of
family.A systematic study of family will
enable you to untangle your emotions
from your understanding of family.An
objective look at the varieties of families
will better equip you to understand your
own family relationships.This will allow
you to bypass your preconceived ideas
about marriage and family,come to a
better understanding of yourself and your
role within your family,and make more
informed choices regarding future
relationships.
This text looks at the family through
the lens of the transition point of the
family life cycle.Thefamily life cycleis a
series of emotional and intellectual stages
families go through from childhood
through retirement.The family is a system
that constantly changes as it moves
through time (Carter & McGoldrick,
2005).The family life cycle is also a
multigenerational view of these changes.
For instance,as a child leaves home,the
parents renegotiate their relationship with
the departing child.As parents grow older,
adult children renegotiate their
relationships with their aging parents to
accommodate their increasing need for
care.Each new stage involves transition
marked by a heightened period of crisis
through which families must navigate.
The more you understand the challenges
of each stage of the cycle,the more likely
you are to successfully move from one
stage to the next.Carter and McGoldrick
(1989,2005) present one of the most
thorough discussions of the family life
cycle.They have proposed the following
stages,which provide the foundation for
the chapters to follow:Chapter 1
- Independence—This is a period of
young adulthood with a focus on
emotional separation from one’s
family of origin. - Coupling or marriage—This stage
involves developing the ability to
make a commitment to a
relationship and family. - Parenting: babies through
adolescents—During this stage,
parents decide whether or not to
have children,develop the skills
necessary to parent,and balance
their roles as individuals,spouses,
and parents. - Launching adult children—As
children leave home,parents develop
an adult relationship with them.This
also requires the acceptance of new
members into the family as adult
children marry.