Marriage and Family Life: The ParentingYearsmotivated by love,or children will grow
up resentful,discouraged,and rebellious
(Colossians 3:21).
God Is Faithful.Our world is broken.
It is full of broken promises,failed
marriages,deceit,and dishonesty.But
that was not God’s original design.God
is faithful and true to HisWord
(Deuteronomy 7:9; Psalm 36:5;
Lamentations 3:22–23).God’s children
never have to question His faithfulness
to them.Human children need their
parents to be faithful as well.They need
to know they can trust their parents.
Parents accomplish this by being
consistent and true to their word.That
means setting appropriate limits and
consistently applying appropriate
consequences.Children will learn“we
say what we mean and we mean what we
say.”Scripture often uses the metaphor
of“rock”when referring to God.
Children can come to know their
parents as a rock in their lives,a rock
which is solid and models the
faithfulness of God.
God Is Patient.God’s patience is really
a display of His mercy.His patience is
demonstrated again and again in the
Bible—with the first family in Eden,with
the Israelites,toward the Gentiles,and in
His judgments (Nahum 1:3a; Nehemiah
9:17; Psalm 103:8; 145:8).Christians
often say,“Do not pray for patience,”
because the situations in which we learn
patience are often painful.Yet James
affirmed just the opposite—God’sWord
insists we should welcome such painful
circumstances and even“consider it pure
joy,my brothers,whenever you face trials
of many kinds,because you know that
the testing of your faith develops
perseverance”(James 1:2–3),and
perseverance,he went on to explain in
verse 4,“develops maturity.”
Mature patience is an important
parental attribute.Children can be
challenging,but James suggested those
challenges should be counted as joys!
Those little“joys”may know exactly
when a parent is on the last nerve,and
they know how to step on it! Can we see
those exasperating moments as
opportunities for us to mature—and to
be joyful (albeit,not necessarily happy)
about it?
Likewise,it’s always important to
remember they are children,not
miniature adults—parents’expectations
must be age-appropriate.(Again,that is
part of the“maturity”scenario.)
Learning to be patient may be as simple
as lowering expectations of oneself.
When parents are too busy,too
overcommitted,they can forget their
children are a gift—entrusted to them
for a short time—time that can never be
reclaimed.