Chapter 13
problems Wallerstein found; however, he
did find significantly lower measures of
achievement, social adjustment, and well-
being than adult children from intact
families. He also noted gender differences
in social adjustment, with boys showing a
greater deficit in social adjustment than
girls. Despite these problems, he suggests
most children from divorced families
grow up to be well-adjusted, successful
people. The worst outcome for children,
he says, is to remain in an intact family in
which there is a chronic, high level of
conflict. In this situation, children
actually benefited from their parents’
separation because it removed them from
an adverse, unhappy environment
(Amato, 2001).
Andrew Cherlin agrees the picture is
not as grim as some researchers paint,
although divorce still has negative effects.
He suggests some of the problems
attributed to divorce—such as school and
behavior problems—were already present
prior to the parents’ separation. His work
also implies most of the problems the
children of divorced parents experience
are due to long-standing psychological
problems of the parents, poverty, racism,
and the disabilities of the children
(Cherlin, 1999; Cherlin, 2002; Cherlin &
Furstenburg, 1991).
Hetherington and colleagues have
been charting the psychological progress
of children for over 25 years. They report
less critically on the effects of divorce
than some of their colleagues. However,
they acknowledge certain very real
increased difficulties. Twenty years after a
divorce, they found, life improved for
only about 20% of divorced adults, while
30% remained desperately unhappy
(Hetherington & Kelly, 2002).
For children of divorce, Hetherington
and colleagues found the first year to be
the hardest for children, but the second
year brought improvement. Boys
typically rebelled against their mothers
while girls tended to experience more
stress and sometimes became sexually
promiscuous. However, the majority of
children of divorce were functioning
within a normal range 20 years later,
however, not without some lasting
effects. Adult children of divorce have
roughly double the divorce rate of those
from stable families, due in part to less
commitment to the permanence of
marriage and fewer relationship skills.
Children of divorce also were more likely
to experience estrangement from their
fathers. It seems very few fathers are able
to maintain a vital relationship with their
children; thus, two thirds of the boys and
three quarters of the girls were found to
have poor relationships with their
fathers. Hetherington and colleagues
admit many of the adult children she
studied considered themselves
permanently scarred by the experience of
their parents’ divorces (Hetherington &
Kelly, 2002).