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Divorce and Remarriage

custody of children) who are living in
poverty (Wallerstein, Lewis, & Blakeslee,
2000). This trend is far more severe for
women and children, since most children
of divorce reside with their mothers.
Another study documents women
experience a 30% drop in income level, as
compared to a 10–15% increase for
divorced men (Stafford, Eccles, & Schoeni,
2003).

The Effects of Divorce on Personal
Well-Being

Immediate Effects on Children.In the
immediate aftermath of divorce, children
suffer from loneliness, fear, worry, sadness,
anger, guilt, and feelings of rejection.

Children of divorce are more likely to

experience depression, withdrawal, and

aggressive or impulsive behavior than

children from intact families (Popenoe,

1995; Amato, 2001). Their routines are

disrupted and their household is in

disarray, frequently for years. They often

face relocation to a new neighborhood,

new school, and new friends, as well as the

loss of old friends. Just when they need

their parents the most to help them make

sense of what is happening, they

experience preoccupied parents who are

also trying to cope with the stresses

surrounding divorce (Hetherington &

Kelly, 2002). Children often find the pain

and grieving following the separation of

their parents overwhelming.

Wallerstein found two thirds of the

children she followed longed for their

absent parent, and over one half

experienced feelings of rejection from one

or both parents. Less than 10% of the

children experienced relief at the divorce

(Wallerstein, Lewis, & Blakeslee, 2000).

Children couldn’t understand why one of

their parents was gone and, subsequently,

often felt their parent had abandoned

them. If the father was the one who left,

young boys often mistook their mother’s

criticism of their father as criticism of

themselves. Both boys and girls frequently

felt they were to blame for their parents’

divorces (Wallerstein & Blakeslee, 2003).

Long-Term Effects on Children.Five

years after a divorce, according to

Children often find the pain and grieving

following the separation of their

parents overwhelming.

Image from BigstockPhoto.com / Masza S