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Chapter 13

divorce is the unpardonable sin. No wonder

church attendance for divorced families

often decreases or stops altogether.

Working Through Marital Difficulties

Divorce has consequences. While

researchers may disagree on the severity of

the consequences, they agree divorce

wreaks havoc on adults and children. The

good news is marriages can be saved. We

routinely see marriages turn around. Even

couples on the way to divorce can

revitalize their relationships into healthy,

satisfying marriages. Marriage counseling

can be an effective tool to help couples

work through their marital difficulties.

Unfortunately, most couples don’t seek

out a therapist until the marriage is nearly

ruined. Not all counselors or psychologists

have the training and experience to work

through the complicated issues couples

bring into therapy. It is important to find a

therapist trained in couple and family

therapy. Therapists who are clinical

members of the American Association for

Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT)

have this kind of specialized knowledge and

training to help couples restore the love

and tenderness they long for in their

marriages. A person of faith should seek a

therapist who is sensitive to faith issues. A

therapist with this kind of training can be

found at http://www.therapistlocator.net

(accessed June 23, 2009), a service of the

American Association for Marriage and

Family Therapy.

Covenant Marriage Revisited

The biblical concept of “until death do

us part” can be seen in a covenant

marriage. In chapter 6, we equated a

biblical model of marriage with covenant

marriage. In our context here, we are

referring to a modern concept of marriage

which stems from a Christian, cultural,

and political response to no-fault divorce.

We looked at this earlier in the section on

types of divorce.

In a covenant marriage, couples agree to

attend premarital counseling. They also

accept much more limited grounds for

divorce. This serves to provide both spouses

with the security and motivation to work

hard to make a good marriage, knowing the

Unfortunately, most couples don’t seek out atherapist until the marriage is nearly ruined. other is committed to the same purpose.

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