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Building Strong Families

Time Together

Strong families spend time together

because they enjoy one another. Spending

time together is one way to show love and

caring. We saw in earlier chapters family

time often suffers as the result of over-full

work and school schedules. In too many

families, family time is little more than an

assortment of household duties, after-

school activities, and errands. Quality

family time is time spent together as a

family to build and share positive

experiences. Families can accomplish this

by scheduling one night a week for the

family only. Activities can include eating

meals together, doing projects together,

watching a movie together, or playing

games (DeFrain & Stinnett, 2002; Olson &

DeFrain, 2006). These kinds of family

rituals have been associated with greater

marital satisfaction, family satisfaction, and

greater well-being of children (Leon &

Jacobvitz, 2003).

Many parents feel their children really

do not want to spend time with them.

According to Stinnett and DeFrain (1985),

when 1,500 school-age children were

asked what they thought made a happy

family, the most frequent answer was

“doing things together.” Not money, cars,

big houses, or televisions, but time spent

together.

The ideal amount of family togetherness

depends on the age and structure of the

family. Families with young children

naturally spend more time together because

young children require more care. Families

with adolescents usually spend less time

together because adolescents spend more

time with their friends as they make the

transition to young adulthood. Single

parents may spend more time with their

children if there are no other adults in the

household. They may spend less time with

their children if they are working multiple

jobs to make ends meet. Either way, single

parents need to make time for adult

interaction, even if this means arranging for

childcare.

Strong families spend time together because

they enjoy one another.

These commandments that I give you today are to
be upon your hearts. Impress them on your
children. Talk about them when you sit at home and
when you walk along the road, when you lie down
and when you get up.
—Deuteronomy 6:6–7

May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice
in the wife of your youth.
—Proverbs 5:18

Image from BigstockPhoto.com / Kzenon