Start Where You Are

(Dana P.) #1

process, rather than becoming more dependent.



  1. Resolution. The fourth aspect of laying down
    your evil action is the resolve not to repeat it. Again,
    this can be tricky if misunderstood: the point is not to
    be harsh with yourself. Don’t let an authoritarian
    inner voice tell you that if you do it again you’re going
    to get a lump of coal in the bottom of your stocking.
    All four parts of this process come from confi-
    dence in your basic goodness. All four come out of
    some gentleness toward yourself because there’s al-
    ready a sense of appreciation. You can regret your
    neurosis and open. You can refrain from doing it
    again because you don’t want to harm yourself any-
    more. You can practice because you have basic re-
    spect for yourself, and you wish to do what nurtures
    your sense of confidence and warriorship rather than
    what makes you feel more poverty-stricken and iso-
    lated. So, finally, resolving not to do it again becomes
    a complete surrender, the last stage in a fourfold
    process of opening further.


Feeding the ghosts. So far we’ve described two of the
practices in “Four practices are the best of methods”:
accumulating merit and confessing our neurotic
crimes, or purifying our neurosis through this four-
fold process. The third practice is to feed the ghosts.
This involves relating to your unreasonableness. The
way you relate to it is by making a relationship with it.
Traditionally, you make a little torma—a little cake—


104 Overcoming Resistance

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