stomach that I didn’t think I ever could.
I remember becoming frustrated that same year in kindergarten,
because I was having trouble remembering how to spell and fit
my twelve-letter last name onto the page. So I kept erasing it
and starting over again. My poor kindergarten teacher got so
tired of waiting for me to finish an assignment that she finally
cut off all my erasers so I couldn’t erase another letter if I made
a mistake. I just had to move on. That was devastating to me.
In first grade I realized I was not reading as well as my friends,
and I became embarrassed. I hated having to read in front of
my peers, so I started feeling sick when I had to go to school.
A few months into first grade, I was tested and diagnosed as
being “learning disabled.” As I write this book, only my closest
core group of friends even knows this about me. To this day I
still struggle with that truth. Yet I’m learning as I mature in my
faith that even with this thorn, this pain, I can still choose to
give glory to God. Oh how many tears have I cried, asking God
why He has allowed this struggle in my life? I have to deal with
its effects on a daily basis, yet if knowing this about me
encourages one fellow sister in Christ to live more boldly and
bravely for God, it is all worth it.
My life is for God’s glory. I have questioned Him many times
and even claimed that, if only He had made me without this
thorn, I could change the world for Him! But He gently reminds
me that I already am changing the world for His glory in just
the way He had planned: through my weakness. With every
blog post I write I have to depend on Him. With trembling
hands and a nervous stomach I press “publish,” hoping that
what I wrote sounded okay, hoping that I didn’t misspell a
word, praying that the words He wrote through me touch at