showers or baths at that place because when we turned the
water on, dead ants and orange-colored, rusty water flowed
from the pipes. Besides, the smell of the water was so bad I
vividly remember holding my breath and trying to brush my
teeth fast enough so that I wouldn’t have to smell it.
As a child, times were tough. One evening at the local grocery
store a man started flirting with my mom when he noticed she
wasn’t wearing a wedding ring. He began following us around
the store, and when my mom didn’t respond to his advances,
he became angry. He started saying all kinds of degrading
things to her, and I remember being scared and angry with him
at the same time. In my innocence I wanted to protect my mom
but didn’t know how. After aisles and aisles of the man
following us around the store, he finally left after he started
getting some looks from fellow shoppers. Not having a father
figure in the family can make you feel vulnerable. It’s not as if
my father was around a lot when I was growing up. He wasn’t.
Partly it was due to his job and partly because he chose to
travel, but either way my mom, brother, and I were accustomed
to being alone. After the divorce, being alone with just the
three of us felt different. It was almost as if the sense of
security was taken away, and I felt vulnerable.
Being a single parent is rough. Being the child of a single
parent is hard too. But through that hard time in my life, God
was right there in the midst of us, even when I didn’t feel Him.
I’m learning that in my life. He is always there, even when I
can’t feel Him, even when it feels as though He’s not listening
to my prayers, even when my prayers go unanswered. He is
still next to me, loving me, looking over me, and many times
carrying me through the painful days. Many times I didn’t see