Life Skills & Leadership: Unit 1, Session 1: Me and My Assets | Page 6 of 128
“I’d like each group to share its flip chart. When it does, the rest of us will look at the drawings and we’ll
try to guess the things the group discovered that good listeners do”
- One at a time, ask groups to share their flip charts and allow the rest of the group to make guesses.
Before moving to another group’s report, be prepared to discuss the ideas uncovered by each group in
more detail. Select from the following questions and ask the groups to make additions to their flip
chart if needed.
Body: In some places, people stand face-to-face to show good listening. In others, touching
is important. What is expected here in your community? Is it different when people are of
the opposite gender or of very different ages?
Eyes: Where should a good listener look? Are listeners more respectful when they look
directly at you or when they look somewhere else?
Movement: What are some specific gestures that show good listening? Is it possible for
listeners to overreact to what they are hearing?
Focus: For some, taking notes shows good listening. For others, it’s all right to talk to
another person for a few minutes. Some people think it’s OK to use a cellphone while
listening to you. What’s OK for you?
Emotions: How do you know the listener understands your feelings? How important is this
for you as someone who wants to be heard?
Voice: What things would someone say that would show she or he is a great listener? What
are some sounds a good listener makes that are not words?
- Ask some general questions about effective listening:
Which of these listening skills do you think is most important?
Which do you think are most difficult to remember to do?
What is a listening skill that you might like to try more often?
Why is it important that we use these skills of effective listening?
“Notice that you don’t have to say anything to use these listening skills. It shows that a lot of
communication is not about the words we use. Sometimes, good communication is about how well we
are able to demonstrate that we are listening.
- Point out that there are also some simple things we can say to show we are listening. Say:
“Besides showing that you are paying attention and that you care, when you are a good listener you
can also help the person think more clearly about her or his situation, whether she or he is telling you
about something really positive, or something that is a problem. For example, there are some very
specific things you can say that will help she or he move from complaining to solving her or his problem
- or at least feeling better about it.”
- Distribute Handout 1: Show You Are Listening. Explain each of the suggestions (Encourage, Feelings,
Clarify, Questions, and Summarize) in your own words. Answer any questions. Say:
