The Dating Black book

(Dana P.) #1
© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
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measured amount of flirtatious behavior, just enough so she doesn’t think you’re a cold fish. The
objective is to give her just a little less physical attention than she desires initially.
The bottom line: Make her wonder how much you’re digging her.
There’s a show business saying that I think every man should chant several times a day:


Always leave them wanting more.

This generates what you’ve heard me refer to before as response potential. You are
trying to stimulate her desire, and then leave it largely unfulfilled. This way, you’ll have the
supply, and she will have the demand. You’re giving her the space to take action in. If you
overdo it, you’ll smother her. (Remember: Two steps forward, one step back.)


Let’s face it; playing hard-to-get really does work, though it can come across as
manipulative. There’s a reason it works: We want what is denied to us. The forbidden. You have
to be subtler and more sophisticated in using this to your advantage, and that’s what response
potential will do for you.
Remember, you have no reason to feel manipulative if you’re doing the right things to
keep her interested and working towards a win-win goal, which is getting you two past the rocky
start into a budding romance.


NOW, THE GOOD......................................................................................................................................


And the difference between good and bad kino is very subjective, as well as finely
differentiated. One woman’s good can easily be another’s bad.


On the first meeting, you should make one or two small kino maneuvers. The best one is
a simple – and brief – touch to the arm or shoulder. If you’re in a Starbucks and you need some
more sugar for your coffee, get up, start to walk around her, and then place your hand on her
back gently as you ask her if there’s anything you can get her. Remove your hand after a
second. Don’t linger too long, or you’ll defuse the power and possibly risk her discomfort. If you
cross a street, offer her your arm. She will be impressed.
What you want to do is build up her anticipation. Every woman wants to know what the
other person feels like, the touch of their skin against theirs. There’s a great deal of power in the
novelty of this – the newness. She hasn’t touched you before, and part of your job is to keep her
wondering about it long enough that she will respond positively when you do. You tease this
part of her mind when you give her an unexpected hint of what is to come. Don’t touch her too
early, and make sure the touch is no longer than a second, so that she knows you’re not going
to start pawing her.

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