© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.Scarcity versus Abundance ................................................................................................................
Do you see limitless options in the world?
Do you see enough success in the world for everyone? Or do you find yourself jealous
when a friend or co-worker achieves something worthwhile?
Do you believe that Success is like a pie, and you have to get your slice or someone
else might get it instead? Do you think that when someone gets a girl, that leaves one less for
you?
Are you afraid of losing a chance for sex with a woman?
These questions highlight whether you have a scarcity or an abundance mentality. When
you are motivated by scarcity, you are motivated by the fear of loss. You act only when you feel
you must, because something in your life may be taken away if you don’t. You don’t seize
opportunity; you fight to keep what you’ve got.
When you have an abundance mentality, you see that there are more options in the
world than you have time to explore. There are more women in the world than you have time to
meet, much less waste your time on the ones who aren’t interested in you. The universe is filled
with infinite possibilities, and you have no time to wallow in despair over failures (perceived or
real).
NEVER forget you were born without her. And that there are hundreds more like her
and thousands more that are even better than her. Don’t waste your time!Here is a concept I learned while in sales, and it is extremely valid in the world of dating.
It is a great motivator to combat the sneaky voice of LoserBoy, and to do the things you know
you must in order to be successful.
The more you do the things that unsuccessful people won’t do, the more successful you will be.The more you do the things that would deter or discourage others, the greater a success
you will be. And if you can find a way to actually like doing those things, you’ll win even bigger.
When I was working in financial services, I noticed that there were so many people in
our business who absolutely refused to do any cold calling. You’d think they would have to dip
their heads in gasoline with all the resistance they gave. So I went out and got a Criss-Cross
directory (also known as a reverse telephone directory, which lists people by address as well as
name) and called everyone within my county. I came up with a script and I set a goal of getting
four appointments a night. Initially, it was painful (if you think dating is fraught with rejection, try
cold sales, my friends.) But after a while, it got to be easy, because I accepted that the worst
thing that could happen was that they would say no, and I kept going. And I even started to get
good at it after a while, and I got sales. I did what others would not, and achieved success as a
result.
What almost all of our fears boil down to, in essence, is a fear of displeasing others. At
the root of our fears in life, we learned from an early age that we don’t want to get anyone angry
with us. It started with our parents, and ever since then, we’ve been a slave to the approval of