© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.So, are you ready now? Great. Let’s review the best way I’ve found for getting the digits:“Hey, it was good meeting you.” Turn, start to walk away, turn back. “You know, we
might want to continue this conversation. What’s your phone number?”
You’ve just presented her with a buy-or-bail decision. If she’s interested in you, she’ll tell
you. If she says anything else to you, from “I don’t give out my home phone number” to “I’m a
secret agent and can’t risk giving up my cover” – if she says anything that resembles no, you
say:
“The night is young.” Wink, and then walk away. In your head you holler “NEXT!”
You see, if she is interested in you, she’ll give you her phone number. Just like that. This
isn’t rocket science, Stud-muffin. But you know, most guys invent a clever fiction about what her
excuse means, and then end up giving his phone number to her and loses his posture. (If she
was interested enough to call you, she wouldn’t have refused to give you her phone number to
begin with). You might try talking to her some more and giving her a better warm-fuzzy, and
then ask again. But be willing to accept that this gal has an issue that you can’t overcome. And,
don’t give her your number unless she give you hers first. She’ll never call, and it’s a false hope
to create for yourself. You don’t need any more de-motivators.
What also happened with that closing line I gave you is unspoken, and essential in the
conversation. When you close off the conversation and appear to walk away, you’re giving her
the opportunity to feel some space – and regret. Regret? Yes. As you leave her with a positive
feeling, she’ll feel regret and a pang of desire to continue the feeling. Her defensive shields will
have lowered a bit, and now she’s a bit more open to approach, since you didn’t come on
strong. Then, when you turn and pull her back, she’ll be more interested than if you were to just
have launched into asking her for her phone number right away. You’ll improve your success by
letting her breathe a little in between, showing her you won’t run her over.
Another bit of advice: No matter what conversation situation you find yourself in, have a
strong close. I made this mistake many times in the past, and I see it happen all the time: A guy
walks up to a woman and starts a conversation, he breaks that pain threshold and gets off to a
great start. The woman is responsive, and they chat for a bit. The guy runs out of steam, and a
silence ensues. He starts to lose his cool, and usually, if she is with a girlfriend, her friend will
step back in and start talking with the gal you were interested in, saving her. The guy gets
alienated and stares off into space, losing more of his cool and not knowing how to revive the
conversation, every moment making it harder and harder. Eventually he turns back to his drink,
or his stool-mate, and sinks into a gloom, letting the conversation dwindle and die out. She
sighs and thinks “Too bad, another wimp,” and waits for another guy to try. He starts to
rationalize to make himself feel better. “She probably wasn’t my type anyways. Probably frigid/ a
lesbian/ a bitch...”