marriage and even subsequently, remain similar in
many parts of these countries. Variations exist due
to class and region and the type of kinship system
(matrilineal or patrilineal), which can make the
experience of divorce and its aftermath different
for different social groups.
Reliable information on the experiences of
divorce is difficult to come by because of the few
systematic empirical studies of the topic. Legal
issues dominate the literature, and the work of
social workers, non-governmental organizations,
and others dealing with women’s issues provides
some information regarding women’s experiences
of the formal legal system. Studies reported in
Ahmad (2003) show that there is considerable
social stigma attached to divorce. Divorce is more
frequent among families from the lower socioeco-
nomic strata than among the middle and upper
classes. The most commonly practiced procedure
for divorce is the unilateral †alàq, where the hus-
band pronounces the divorce formula three times
on the same occasion, thus making the divorce
irrevocable and final. Though from the religious
point of view this is considered reprehensible, not
only is it legal, but it is also generally believed to be
the proper procedure. Commonly cited reasons for
divorce are the inability of the wife to have chil-
dren, a second marriage of the husband, non-main-
tenance of the wife by the husband, or insufficient
dowry provided by the wife’s family.
In a situation where few women are economi-
cally independent, where there is a high rate of
female illiteracy, and where divorce carries a
stigma, only a small proportion of women are able
to take advantage of the rights given under the
Dissolution of Muslim Marriages Act of 1939,
which is the operative law dealing with divorce ini-
tiated by women in Bangladesh, India, and Pakis-
tan. The problem of having to prove the grounds
for divorce, which may be compounded by the time
lag between separating from the husband and filing
the case, ignorance of the procedure involved in
establishing proof (such as prior police complaints
in the case of violence), the expense of litigation,
and the uncertainty of the outcome, all make the
court option a distant one for most women. The
fact that a large number of cases do not reach com-
pletion in the courts points to the possibility that
out of court settlements are reached. Case studies
suggest that recourse to the court can be initiated as
a pressure tactic to get the husband to grant a
divorce, which he may be refusing to do in order to
avoid paying the dues of mahrand maintenance
that the court would require.
The imbalance in the law is compounded by
south asia 107social norms and practices that put women in an
inferior position economically and socially. Mar-
riage is practically universal, and is considered to
be the foremost source of security for a woman.
Cultural ideals, such as that “a woman should
leave her husband’s home only in a coffin,” deter
women from opting out of a marriage even if it is
highly abusive. The unrestricted right of divorce
means that the threat of divorce can be used as a
means of controlling the behavior of the wife. The
cultural norm that the wife’s side does not take any
initiative that could jeopardize the marriage means
that women do not press for divorce, living in hope
that their situation will change for the better. Since
most women are not in a position where they can
be financially and emotionally independent, major
considerations for a woman if she wants to sepa-
rate from her husband are to minimize the stigma
that arises from accusations of being responsible
for the divorce and to arrange for her own financial
security. Often women prefer to remain separated
from the husband, accepting polygamous mar-
riages, violent marriages, or even non-support,
rather than to press for divorce and its attendant
insecurity. On the other hand, since the oral divorce
allows for considerable misuse, for instance, leaving
women uncertain as to their marital status, women
are often forced to initiate divorce proceedings in
order to clarify their marital situation, especially if
there is a possibility of their remarriage. The uncer-
tainty of marital status can have dangerous reper-
cussions if, for instance, the wife who believes she
has been divorced remarries and is then charged
with adultery by the former husband, as has hap-
pened in Pakistan. A trend that has been reported
with reference to cases registered in the Sharì≠a
courts or with the local kazi (judge) is that there is
an increase in cases of khul≠in recent years. This
increase appears to indicate that women are being
forced to purchase their freedom by agreeing to
give up their right to mahrand maintenance, rather
than that they are initiating divorce. The unequal
relations between wife-givers and wife-takers is
also illustrated in the dowry system, where gifts are
expected to flow from the bride’s family to the
groom and his family. The mahr, which is a gift
given by the husband to the wife in consideration of
the marriage, and which could act as a security for
the wife in case of divorce, thus does not fit into the
cultural norm. More often than not the mahris a
token amount of Rs. 786, Rs. 555, or even as low
as Rs. 50. In communities where the mahris fixed
at a high rate, often the assumption is that it is not
actually to be paid. Though a high mahris seen as
a way of deterring divorce, in practice, a husband