130 Leading with NLP
Roman law permits only simple learning – problem-solv-
ing within fixed boundaries of thought and action. Common
law permits generative learning – learning that has the pos-
sibility of not only solving a problem, but also of eliminating
the thinking that caused the problem in the first place.
Generative learning can build you a faster set of wheels to
make the journey – or you may find it would be better to
travel somewhere else entirely.
I know a manager in a small department of a media com-
pany that deals with advanced graphics software. Phil was very
innovative and always looking for improvements, ‘If it ain’t
broke, make it better’ was his motto and this brought him
into conflict with his manager David, who was not keen on
the stream of ideas from Phil. His position was ‘If it ain’t
broke, leave it alone.’ He did not want Phil to mess about
with any products until they had been evaluated. Phil ex-
celled in getting down to the details of the software, while
David was more interested in the bigger picture. Phil felt very
frustrated. He did not feel valued in the company and he
thought David was blocking his ideas and his chance of pro-
motion. He wanted a chance to prove himself and his ideas.
Phil kept coming to David with new ideas and each time
David put him off. Phil knew some NLP and he started to try
and get rapport with David by matching general body pos-
ture in meetings and also matching speed of voice tone.
They got on much better, but David still blocked Phil’s ideas.
Phil had long arguments with David and tried to convince
him that his ideas were worth looking at, but got nowhere.
Phil was a more visual thinker, thinking in pictures. David
was a kinesthetic thinker, he relied on his feelings and intu-
itions. So Phil changed his habitual visual language (‘I see
this as really important, it can expand our horizons, why
does everything have to be black and white?’) when he spoke
to David. He explained his ideas in kinesthetic language, say-
ing things like, ‘I think this is a really strong idea, I would
like you to get a handle on it, so that you feel it is worth pur-
suing.’ Again rapport improved, but Phil did not get any
further with his ideas. He tried to get agreement with David