rebellion, but rather to stepping beyond the artificial bounds of po-
liteness imposed before you learned to think for yourself.
Perhaps the particular rules that hold you back have been oper-
ating in your consciousness without awareness for decades. Once
you are aware of the existence of these childhood rules, you can
catch yourself when you hear them functioning in your conscious-
ness. When this happens, simply laugh at their feeble attempt to
stop you by remembering you are grown up now.
The rules in your family may have been different from the 10
examples listed. Ask yourself what your parents taught you (both
by instruction and by example) about money and about proper
behavior. A list of such items may turn up rules that no longer
serve you.
LISTYOURPERSONALCHILDHOODRULES
Take a moment now to start a list of the childhood rules in your
household. You’ll discover that some of them are still highly use-
ful, while others may be holding you back from your dreams. Do
this now. Remember, the more you put into these exercises, the more you
will benefit.
One of Phil’s clients, Edgar, was a skilled Internet program-
mer unhappily employed in Corporate America. He dreamed of
starting his own business, but was afraid to. In addition to many
of the 10 common childhood rules, his father was a vigorous ad-
vocate of getting a job with a good company and staying there.
Until he started working with Phil, Edgar had been following the
common childhood rules, as well as his father’s admonitions
about the importance of the financial security that comes from a
job with a big company.
He began selling a $5 to $20 item (this is described in detail in
Chapter 13) and began to deal with some of the feelings and
thoughts that comprised his inherited purpose. After about six
months, he broke free of his inherited purpose and started his own
Internet business.
ROLES
Family roles appear to be the most important aspect in the develop-
ment of inherited purpose and, therefore, have an effect on adult
behavior usually more significant than boundaries, bonds, or rules.
Rules 85