"Oh, I love that show!" she said.
I smiled at her. She just volunteered to be my target.
"Okay, then maybe you can help me out with this," I said. "I have a theory, that Every
girl relates to one of the Desperate Housewives more than the others, and you can tell a
lot about her based on the one she likes the best. But it only works if you've seen the
show. So you've seen it, but what about the rest of you?"
"We've all seen it," said the chubby one.
"Great, then you know what I'm talking about. So which one is your favorite?"
"Why are you asking us this?" said the chubby one suspiciously.
I pointed to Allan and Gary at our table. "See those two guys over there?" I asked.
"Yeah," she said.
"We've been arguing about this all night, and I wanted to prove my theory. So I wanted
to get a female viewpoint on this. But I can already tell which Housewife you relate to
best."
The chubby one got a bit defensive at this.
"Okay," she said. "Which one?"
"I'd say you relate most to the Ava Longoria character."
The chubby one looked at me strange. I was wrong, but I knew that before I said it.
"Why's that?" she asked.
"Because her character is smarter than most give her credit for, and she has a great deal
of inner strength that helps her to get what she wants, even though others constantly
underestimate her."
The chubby one softened up a bit more at this. "I actually like Felicity Huffman better,"
she said.
"Why's that?" I asked.
"Because she doesn't take sh*t from anyone, and no matter what happens to her, she's a
good mom and a good wife who loves her family."
"Awesome! See? I knew you had it in you!"
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