EXTERIOR INFLUENCE VS. INTERIOR INFLUENCE
“It’s not working!” Gerrymander grumbled. “This crap doesn’t work!”
He stormed out of the club. The girl I was talking to watched him go.
“Is there something wrong with your friend?” she asked.
“Um...” I didn’t know how to respond. “I think his blood sugar is just low.”
Her friend, the one Gerrymander had been trying to pick up, reappeared from the patio
that he had isolated her to.
“What happened?” my girl asked.
“He got all creepy and weird,” she said. “He was doing all this weird psychology stuff
on me, and got upset when I asked him about it.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Well, we were heading out anyway. It was a pleasure meeting you girls.”
Outside the club, Gerrymander was pacing back and forth mumbling to himself.
Gerrymander (as he went by online, his real name was Jerry, get it?) was a guy I had met
off of one of the many online forums about dating. We had met at a seminar and he
seemed like a cool enough guy to go out picking up women with.
“Dude,” I said. “You okay?”
“Do I look okay?” he groaned. “I’ve been had. Tricked. I can’t believe I fell for this
stuff.”
“Whoa, slow down,” I said. “What’s going on?”
“We’ve been doing this for a month. Going out almost every night, memorizing pages of
routines, sometimes I feel like a Broadway actor. Only difference is I’m not getting
laid!”
“You assume Broadway actors get laid,” I joked.
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