“You make mistakes. You are stupid. You ought to feel ashamed of yourself!”
I was out with a guy not long ago who, after striking out with a woman, would come back
to my table and repeat over-and-over “Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!” chastising himself for
doing something dumb because the girl he talked to didn’t automatically want to sleep
with him.
In his mind, he did something wrong, something STUPID, and he had to punish himself
for doing such a dumb thing like TALKING TO A GIRL.
As you can imagine, this poor guy hates talking to women.
A personal favorite myth of mine is the Fat myth – probably because that’s one of the big
myths that I buy into.
When I look into the mirror, my eyes instantly go to my gut, and my mind is forever
poking at my fat, real or imagined. I know other men are the same way, especially when
we see and compare ourselves to models and athletes on TV with the six-pack abs and
3% body fat.
When you are stuck in an overweight mind and/or body you cannot escape from, you
start to feel sorry for yourself and ashamed because you think you are inferior to others
who are thin and muscular.
After all, how can you expect to compete with those guys?
The Myth of being Old will tell you only what you cannot do. It defines your limitations
and lost opportunities. Old men look at beautiful young woman and think to themselves
“It’s too late. I’ve have missed out. I blew it. She will never go for a guy as old as
me. I can’t keep up with her.”
Old men feel they will never fulfill their potential, because they have lost their
youth. They use this as an excuse to keep from trying. They don’t want to go to a bar or
a club, they don’t want to stay out late, they don’t think they know anything about the
dating scene. They see their age as a cage from which they cannot escape. They just
can’t do everything they want to do.
After all, you’re not as young as you used to be.
The Ugly Myth reminds you that you are forever handicapped. You are just another
victim of other people’s perceived criticism, and you act and feel like an outsider. You
ostracize yourself, never bothering to pursue a pretty girl because you don’t believe
anyone could ever find you attractive, and if they do, there must be something wrong
with them (because who could be attracted to one so ugly? They must be lying!!!).
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