The first thing that every whiner has to realize is that their lives are not the problem –
their feelings are. Whiners set themselves up to feel like victims, like their lives are out
of their control and the only thing they can do is complain about it.
Whiners are typically people who feel put-upon, and that they don’t feel they have the
time or ability to do everything they either want or feel they have to do.
Understand, you have just as much time as everyone else on this planet. By that, I mean
you have 24 hours every day to do what you feel you need or want to do. No one else has
an unfair advantage to you in the time department. How you choose to use your time is
YOUR choice and your choice alone. No one can force you to use your time any
differently than you want to.
Typically, whiners are people who choose to take on too much and by doing so, complain
and criticize others. When we feel overworked, or overburdened, we tend to resent the
fact that we feel the need to do so much, and will look for something outside ourselves to
blame, be they friends or loved ones. This is a tactic that is designed to make us feel
helpless, and thus out of control of our own lives.
In order to overcome the habit of whining, you must make a concerted effort to simply
stop complaining, for good.
Complaining is self-pity spoken out loud. And guess what? Self-pity is annoying to
other people! And when people are annoyed, they will never give the whiner the
sympathy they want or feel they deserve.
After all, that’s all whiner’s ever want isn’t it? Someone to pity them?
Ask yourself: Do you want to be pitied?
I should hope the answer to that question is NO.
You choose to do what you want to do. You choose the job you work at, the home you
live in, the people you hang out with, etc. You may HAVE to work 80 hours a week at
the office to get everything that job requires of you done, but if you wanted to, you could
quit that job and find one you only have to work 40 hours a week at. It’s within your
control.
If you want to work that 80 hour a week job because you want to get promoted and make
lots of money, don’t blame your boss for piling on the work, or criticize your secretary
for taking too long with that transcription, or complain about how you have no time for a
social life. You are choosing to work this job because you have a goal. No one is
making you pursue that goal but yourself.
If you’re lonely and feel like you can’t meet a woman, but never go out on weekends or
talk to any women, it’s easy to just say “Woe is me! I’m ugly and no girls like me! No
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