The Teen Survival Guide to Dating & Relating: Real-World Advice on Guys, Girls, Growing Up, and Getting Along

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112 The Teen Survival Guide to Dating and Relating

Ordinarily, I’d encourage you to tell your boyfriend how you feel when he behaves abu-

sively. But in this case, I don’t think he’d listen. Your words might just make him angry, which

could put you in danger.

I agree with your friends—they have your best interests at heart. End this relationship as

soon as possible. Meet your boyfriend in a public place when you tell him that it’s over, and

bring a friend or two with you (so you’re safer). Make a clean break and don’t look back. You

deserve to be treated with much more respect than this guy can give you! I wish you the best.

In friendship,

Terra

He loves me

’

but he hits me

Hey Terra,

My boyfriend hits me a lot, even though he really loves me. I know I should break up with him

(even though I love him) and I have, lots of times, but he always gets me to go back with him

by telling me how sorry he is and that he’ll never do it again. But he always does. Last week,

he pushed me really hard against the wall, and I bruised two ribs. I know it was my fault

because I said something about his car, and he got really mad. When my mom asked me what

happened, I lied to her and told her I fell down the steps. How can I get my boyfriend to stop

being so rough?

Tired of Hurting

Dear Tired of Hurting,

This guy hits you and has bruised your ribs—this is abuse! You can’t get your boyfriend to stop

being rough with you; he has to get professional help for that to happen. If you stay with him,

your life and health are in danger. I want you to know that it’s definitely not yourfault that

he behaves this way. He has a problem.

I know this is hard to hear, but you need to get out of this relationship before you get

even more seriously hurt. You’re 100 percent right when you say that you need to break up

with him. This time, make it for good.