Getting Along with Parents 183
else. Anyway, my mom is moving to this little town to be near my grandparents, and I don’t
want to go! I feel like she’s trying to ruin my life by taking me away from my school and my
friends. I tried to tell her this, but she didn’t listen. Also, this town is in another state, and if
we move there, I won’t get to see my dad very much.
I don’t think that what my dad did was right, but I love him and he treats me with a lot
more respect than my mom does. I think I want to live with him, but I know that would really
hurt my mom. What should I do? Help!
Bootsy
Dear Bootsy,
This is a very difficult situation. When parents divorce, it stresses out everyone involved. Your
mom is obviously upset and angry, and she’s lashing out at your dad. I suggest that you sit
down and talk calmly with her about how you’re feeling. Doing so might help her understand
how much this move will upset you. Although your mom is wrapped up in her own feelings
right now, it’s very important for her to realize how her decisions will affect you, your school-
work, your friendships, and your relationship with your dad.
Do you know another adult you trust enough to talk to? Maybe another relative or a
school counselor? It would help release some of your feelings, especially if your mom isn’t
listening right now. It’s also important that you talk to your dad about what’s going on. He
has rights as a parent, and he might be able to help you figure out your future. Some cus-
tody arrangements don’t allow one parent to take a child to live in another state, and,
depending on the laws where you are, you may be old enough to decide which parent you
want to live with.
Obviously, there are many issues to discuss. Some have to do with emotions, while others
have to do with practical matters. Tell your mom and dad how you’re feeling and let them
know that you want to be involved in this very important decision. Good luck!
In friendship,
Terra