Getting Along with Parents 185
your parents. Few kids really know what their parents’ finances look like. Maybe your par-
ents are feeling money pressures, which makes them doubt whether the high tuition is worth
it. They may believe that the only way you’re getting a “good enough” education is if you
earn all A’s.
Explain to your parents that you’re doing the best you can (if, in fact, you are trying as
hard as you can). The best that you can do doesn’t necessarily mean all A’s; it just means the
best that youcan do. Not all students, no matter how hard they try, get straight A’s. Be open
with your parents about the education you’re receiving. Make sure they understand the pres-
sure you’re under at school but also express to them that you appreciate this opportunity
they’re giving you. I wish you the best.
In friendship,
Terra
KEEPING AGREEMENTS
To prepare you for adulthood, your parents might be emphasizing the impor-
tance of keeping agreements, as well as the consequences for breaking them.
These conversations might even lead to huge arguments. Is there anything you
can do to convince your parents to loosen up their restrictions? Possibly, if you
become a part of the agreement-making process in your family.
Parents think they can make your life easier (that is, less physically danger-
ous and emotionally painful) if they warn you about the “bad stuff.” They advise
you and make certain rules in an effort to protect you from harm. Wanting to
keep you safe is one way parents show love and caring.
But some parents feel the need to give lotsof advice. Maybe your parents are
this way. Of course, you may not want to hear their recommendations all of the
time, but try to understand what might be behind the words. Chances are, your
parents are afraid you’ll make the same mistakes theydid. Their warnings and
advice are given to prevent history from repeating itself.
Sometimes, when parents are feeling particularly nervous, they might load
you down with advice and repeat certain warnings again and again. Maybe they
think you’re not really listening. And maybe you aren’tbecause you resent what
they’re saying. At times like this, assure your parents (nicely) that you’ve gotten
their message.