Getting Along with Parents 193
When a relationship experiences a break in trust, everyone involved suffers.
Fortunately, you can work to rebuild trust. Here’s what you can do:
- Take responsibility for what you did. Acknowledge the part you played
in the situation, explain why you made the choice you did, and describe how
you’ll handle things differently in the future. - Apologize. Saying “I’m sorry” (and meaning it) will help you and your par-
ents feel better. - Make amends. Ask your parents what they’d like you to do to make up for
your mistake, and then do it willingly.
When you do something untrustworthy, you (and other people) might feel
as if you don’t deserve to be trusted again—until you prove otherwise, that is.
What happens if you make amends, but your parents stilldon’t have faith in
you? Let them know how their lack of confidence makes you feel. Find out what
you can do to earn back their trust—and then do it.
What happens if you’ve rarely gotten in trouble and your parents don’t
seem to trust you anyway? A couple of explanations are possible:
- Maybe your parents weren’t trustworthy as teens, so they don’t
expect you to be (even though you are and they want you to be). - Maybe the stories they read in the papers and hear on the news make
your parents fear that you’re doing bad things behind their back.
It’s difficult to prove to someone that you’re trustworthy if you’re already
being as honest and reliable as you can be! It’s also frustrating if you’re telling
the truth but your parents don’t believe you. The best I can suggest is that you
continue to listen to your inner voice, do what you know is right, and always
keep the lines of communication open. This way, you’re staying true to yourself
and your own needs.