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What Are Boyfriend /Girlfriend Relationships All About? 43
He says he loves me and
wants to have sex
Hey Terra,
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three weeks. He’s really cute and sweet. He
says he loves me, and he’s ready to have sex with me! No one’s ever told me that before. I like
(not love) him, but I think I may be ready to have sex with him. I’m really curious about what
it will be like. I’ve never even seen a penis before. But there’s a part of me that’s a little bit
scared. What can I do to relax?
Curious
Dear Curious,
If relaxing means ignoring your doubts, don’t relax! I think that curiosity is a very poor reason
to have sex. There’s too much at risk to take it so casually. Your boyfriend may be the cutest,
sweetest guy in the world, but I seriously doubt that he knows you well enough in three weeks
to love you. It sounds like he’s confusing love with lust.
What’s your rush to have sex with him? You say that you don’t love him. Do you want to
do it just because he wants to or because you’re curious? It’s perfectly natural to be curious
about what a penis looks like, but why not just go to the library and check out some human
anatomy books? That way, you can look all you want without risking pregnancy, sexually
transmitted diseases (STDs), and emotional hurt.
Be honest with yourself. If you’re scared about having sex, that’s your inner voice telling
you this isn’t the right thing to do. Listen to it! Too many girls are willing to believe that they’re
ready to have sex because a guy says, “I love you.” Youare the only one who knows when
you’re ready. If you have sex with your boyfriend and the relationship ends (as 99.9 percent
of all teen relationships do), you probably won’t feel very good about yourself. Do what’s best
for you.Only you know what that is! Take care.
In friendship,
Terra