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62 The Teen Survival Guide to Dating and Relating
Dear Where Is Love,
I agree: nobody’s perfect. But happiness doesn’t come from lowering your standards. It’s okay
to be “picky” because youare the one who needs to be comfortable with your choice. If
you’re clear about which qualities matter to you, stick with them.
On the other hand, you might ask yourself if you’re focusing more on looks than char-
acter traits. Are you having trouble meeting guys because you only want ones who fit very
narrow standards of “good-looking”? Is there a chance that you keep changing your stan-
dards every time a new guy pays attention to you? If this is the case, your inner voice may be
telling you you’re not ready to have a boyfriend. Spend time thinking about what you really
need. I wish you the best.In friendship,
TerraWhat makes a great girlfriend
’
anyway?
Hey Terra,
I look at the girls my friends go out with, and the guys say these girls are “great,” but I don’t
see what’s so great about them. They talk too much, and they’re always complaining if my
friends don’t call them all the time and take them out every weekend. And these girls get
really jealous when the guys talk to any other girl, even if it’s just to say hi or to ask about
homework. So, what makes a great girlfriend, anyway?Just WonderingDear Just Wondering,
Each person has his/her own ideas about what makes another person “great.” Maybe this is
why the girls your friends think are cool don’t really appeal to you. Ultimately, youare the only
person who knows what matters most to you.
Think about the girls you’ve been attracted to. Are they at all similar? Do they share cer-
tain qualities or personality traits? Now think about your friends and what you like about