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82 CAREER ADVICE FOR LIFE SCIENTISTS

Optimizing the

Family-Career Balance

Elizabeth Marincola

The American Society

for Cell Biology

P

eople in general, but perhaps mothers more than

anyone, are phenomenal self-rationalizers. Thus,

if a woman voluntarily foregoes a profession to

raise her children without conflict of a demanding

career, she will believe passionately that this choice,

and the personal, financial, marital, and moral sacri-

fices it entails was the correct one for her family. No

less passionate is the woman who believes that contin-

uing to invest in her career as she raises her family is in

the best interest of her family. This should not be sur-

prising, since all parents love their children more than

anything and put their welfare first.

For those of us who have the choice to work, a cau-

tion: if you ever hear the expression “Super Mom” or

“Super Dad,” you should immediately reject it and

focus on reality. The Superhuman Parent is an accolade

earned exclusively by women and men who have no

choices. These are parents for whom working is not a

social statement nor a feminist right, but an economic

necessity and often a monotonous burden.

Those who have the luxury of choosing to develop a

career and who are passionate about their work will

find a way to maintain and build it while raising their

family. Conversely, those who are fearful of how chil-

dren will fit into their impossible life won’t regret find-

ing the courage of their conviction: parenthood will

Talk about the day’s excitement or

problem in a way your children can

understand. This allows them to get

closer to you by sharing your real

frustrations and satisfactions... Ask

their advice; it may be good.