SUBTEXTadvantages. They are more comfortable with handshakes, and the
casual touch, and it's easier for them to make eye contact. These
are all social skills related to the roles men are taught to play in
society.
Another kind of subtext is related to regional or national speech
patterns. We tend to trust the sound of our own regional accent
and listen with suspicion to that of another. A New Yorker in
Middle America may carry the baggage of a distinctive accent.
He or she is immediately suspect. Conversely, the Midwesterner
or New Englander in New York City might send out a subtext of
naivete, no matter how smart he or she is. The point is, we are
uneasy with subtexts that differ from our own, and we tend to
treat the "other" with suspicion, contempt, or, in some cases,
unwarranted respect.Most people subconsciously per-
ceive and understand subtexts in others. They meet someone who,
on the surface, seems friendly and cooperative, but underneath
they sense an entirely different personality. For some reason, they
don't trust the person, although the mistrust is not based on anything
concrete. What they have done is sense a contradictory subtext.
That feeling can be brought up to the conscious level. With
the help of this book, you will no longer have to say "There's
something about her that I don't trust, but don't ask me what,"
or "I'm not sure why I like him despite his touchiness." You
will learn to understand the underlying message and bring it to
the fore.
Knowing and understanding the elements of subtext will also
allow you to change your own to match what you really want to
project. Take the case of Lisa, who was hired as an assistant by
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