SUBTEXT"I would ask out a woman I work with," one executive told
me, "but I would do my best to keep it out of the office."
"In my experience," a woman executive told me, "practically
every man in our office either has had an affair or is capable of
having one."
"Most of the women in the office," one secretary told me, "will
date a fellow worker. Sure, some of them marry the men, but
not all!"
In my own office experience, I can count at least seven married
people who started office affairs. Four of them eventually divorced
and were "happier" with their new mates. The other three managed
either to have their partners transferred or reassigned themselves
when the affairs broke off.
In the long run, I still believe that the office should be off-
limits for romance. Letty Cottin Pogrebin, who has had varied
experiences in the workplace, agrees. In her book How to Make
It in a Man's World, she advises workers to nip on-the-job romance
in the bud. "It's likely to imperil the job when the sweet talk
turns serious." She cites office romance as a hazard that lies in
wait for those who mix business with pleasure. Pogrebin advises
self-discipline in office relationships and suggests that people look
to parties, friends of friends, blind dates, clubs, adult education,
or other activities before turning to the office. But she, too, recog-
nizes the driving force of sex and concludes that yes, "you can
have an office romance as long as it doesn't interfere with office
business."
Many companies disagree with this and have even set up rules
against it. Some law firms will actually write an employment contract
that prohibits marriage between employees. The Hewlett-Packard
Company has a policy that specifically discourages nonworking
"relationships" between supervisors and those under them. They