SUBTEXTis far more difficult to lie with all the subtextual nuances that
accompany those words.
Yet, once we learn the elements of subtext—the signals that
accompany our words; speech; the meaning of touch; the language
of our bodies and the ethnic, regional, and personal differences
in that language; the clothes we wear and the objects we use—
we are faced with the temptation consciously to control the subtext
we project in order to manipulate others in business and social
relations.
Sometimes such manipulation is necessary and good. Sometimes
it is immoral and dishonest. And there is always the danger that,
even with the best of intentions, conscious manipulation of subtext
can become obvious, and thus contradict its intended message.
We should remember that what we communicate with our subtext
is most effective when it is unconscious. When our actions, our
voices, our appearances all transmit a subtext without our being
aware of it, that subtext will be honest, will be perceived as
honest, and will be very persuasive.
Just as the salesman in our chapter on selling is at his best
when he believes in the product, so we are at our most convincing
when we ourselves believe in what we are saying, whether that
belief is based on intellectual reasons, on an emotional "gut"
feeling, or on a sort of self-hypnosis. Once we believe in our
own words, then all manipulative devices become secondary. The
unconscious can take over, and our subtext will be as strong and
as convincing as our text.
However, this does not mean that a person cannot learn all
the elements of subtext and put them to good use. Indeed, we
should do just that, for once the elements are learned and incorpo-
rated into our behavior, they will surface when they are needed
and we can use them convincingly.