WHAT YOU SEE IS NOT WHAT YOU GETthe world. The mask and its subtext are a way of protecting that
fragile interior.USING THE MASK
If we consider all the situations in which we use the masking
technique, we can realize what a universal device it is to send
out subtext, or rather, not send a subtext. Politeness, something
we think of as a civilized pleasure of our culture, is simply an
elaborate form of masking. We use masking constantly in business,
at school, at home, with our enemies, and with our friends. When
it comes right down to it, very few of us will dare to expose our
inner selves by sending out the subtext of our true feelings.
This inner self is the most sacred part of us, and we are not
expected to reveal it. Masking these feelings is important, provided
the masking is kept within reasonable limits. In fact, showing
our true feelings can be wrong and selfish.
Sandy, in charge of training in the computer department of
her firm, explained this in terms of her relationship to her trainees.
"I can't tell them the truth about their work in the beginning. It
would be counterproductive. Sure, they make some stupid mistakes
and I point out the obvious ones, but I can't let them see how
exasperated I get. I must encourage them, and as long as they
understand the subtext of encouragement behind what I say, they'll
keep on trying. If they think they're doing well, they'll go on to
do better."
Sandy's training technique was a form of masking. Sid, a foreman
on the production line, used a similar technique. "I never tell
the new guys how klutzy they are. I tell them they're doing fine,