TOUCHY SITUATIONSpractice are there. Dr. Erving Goffman, a sociologist, points this
out in his book Relations in Public Places. "The theory that Ameri-
can middle class people don't touch each other when they talk is
nonsense. People are handling each other all the time, but we
read it out. You've got to keep your eyes open to see it."
We "read it out" because it occurs in very natural episodes.
Someone squeezes past someone else in a narrow passage and
takes that person's arm to get by without body contact. In conversa-
tion, one person may touch another to stop a sentence or to allow
a point to be made. People touch their friends and family constantly,
but lightly, and they "read out" the touch because it is so fleeting
as to be subliminal.
It is intriguing that even these light touches can supply a subtext
of caring and concern. And it is even more so with a stronger,
longer touch—always provided the touch is appropriate in place
and time.