5. Death beyond Death
The Ochre Robe
agehananda bharati
yadahareva virajet, tadahareva pravrajet
On the day on which he renounces,
on that very day let him sally forth.
Jabala Upanisad 476
This essay was previously published as “Pilgrimage,” in The Ochre Robe(London: George Allen
& Unwin, 1961), 144–56.
The Panjab Mail is one of the three fastest trains in India. It took me to Banaras
Cantonment in seven hours. I was now entirely on my own, for I did not know any-
one here, except the monks of the Ramakrishna Monastery, and I would hardly seek
their company. A monk is supposed to be on his own, and I felt strong and free. I
thought of Ramakrishna’s advice: find a place to stay, in a new city, then put your
bundle there, and, with that burden off your mind, go sightseeing. His counsel had
been meant metaphorically: first place your mind in the divine resting-place, then
only go and enjoy whatever this world has to offer. But the amazing thing about the
Indian teachers’ advice is that it usually works both ways—and I took it literally. I
deposited my bundle at a rest house near Assi Ghat and went to the Ghat of the Ten
Horse Sacrifices for my bath. I hesitated for a moment, pondering if I should buy
some sort of container for the water, to offer it to Lord Vifvanath. A tallish man of
about fifty approached me and said, “Here is your kamandalu, Maharaj.” I took the
earthen water-pot and was fascinated by its exquisite shape. When I looked up in-
quiringly and to thank him, he had turned and was walking away.
I had darfan of Lord Vifvanath, and then I walked back to the ghat. I knew what
I was looking for: a sannyasito give me sannyasa—a renunciant to give me renun-
ciatory initiation. It was as simple as this. There were some sadhus(ascetics) sitting