The Definitive Book of Body Language

The Definitive Book of Body Language

This gesture has the arms-crossed plus both thumbs up

showing that he's feeling 'cool' and in control. As he talks, he

gestures with his thumbs to emphasise points he is making, As

we've already discussed, the thumbs-up gesture is a way of

showing others we have a self-confident attitude and the

folded arms still gives a feeling of protection.

Someone who is feeling defensive but also submissive at the

same time will sit in a symmetrical position, which means one

side of their body is a perfect mirror of the other. They display

tense muscle tone and look as if they expect to be attacked

whereas a person who is feeling defensive and dominant will

take an asymmetrical pose, that is, one side of the body

doesn't mirror the other.

Getting theThumbs-Up

When you're presenting your case to someone and the
Thumbs-Up-Arms-Crossed appears towards the end of your
presentation and is clustered with other positive gestures, it
signals you can move comfortably into asking the person for a
commitment. On the other hand, if at the close of the presen-
tation the other person takes the Fists-Clenched-Arms-
Crossed position and has a poker face, you can be inviting
trouble by attempting to get a 'yes'. It would be better to ask
questions to try to uncover the person's objections. When
someone says 'no' to a proposal, it can become difficult to
change their mind without looking as if you're aggressive. The
ability to read body language allows you to 'see' a negative
decision before it is verbalised and gives you time to take an
alternative course of action.

When you can see a 'no' before it's said,

you can try a different approach.