The Definitive Book of Body Language

The Power Is in Your Hands

The modern form of this ancient greeting ritual is the inter-

locking and shaking of the palms and was originally used in

the nineteenth century to seal commercial transactions

between men of equal status. It has become widespread only

in the last hundred years or so and has always remained in the

male domain until recent times. In most Western and Euro-

pean countries today it is performed both on initial greeting

and on departure in all business contexts, and increasingly at

parties and social events by both women and men.

The handshake evolved as a way men could

cement a commercial deal with each other.

Even in places such as Japan, where bowing is the traditional

greeting, and Thailand, where they greet using the Wai — a

gesture that looks similar to praying — the modern handshake

is now widely seen. In most places, the hands are normally

pumped five to seven times but in some countries, for example

Germany, they pump two or three times with an additional

hold time equal to an extra two pumps. The French are the

biggest glad-handers, shaking on both greeting and departure

and spending a considerable time each day shaking hands.

Who Should Reach First?

Although it is a generally accepted custom to shake hands
when meeting a person for the first time, there are some cir-
cumstances in which it may not be appropriate for you to
initiate a handshake. Considering that a handshake is a sign of
trust and welcome, it is important to ask yourself several ques-
tions before you initiate the hand shake: Am I welcome? Is this
person happy to meet me or am I forcing them into it? Sales-
People are taught that if they initiate a handshake with a
customer on whom they call unannounced or uninvited, it can
Produce a negative result as the buyer may not want to