(refer: Ram Charit Manas, Baal Kand, Doha no. 52). In a way the sages told Parvati
that the proper way to test someone is to be honest with him. They had
straightforwardly asked Parvati why she was doing Tapa without using any disguise
to hide their identity to mislead her.]∑§„Uà ’øŸ ◊ŸÈ •Áà ‚∑ȧøÊß ̧ – „°UÁ‚„U„ÈU ‚ÈÁŸ „U◊ÊÁ⁄U ¡«∏UÃÊß ̧H 4H
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kahata bacana manu ati sakucā'ī. ham̐sihahu suni hamāri jaṛatā'ī. 4.
manu haṭha parā na suna'i sikhāvā. cahata bāri para bhīti uṭhāvā. 5.
nārada kahā satya sō'i jānā. binu paṅkhanha hama cahahiṁ uṛānā. 6.
dēkhahu muni abibēku hamārā. cāhi'a sadā sivahi bharatārā. 7.
Parvati (“Sailkumari”) was very hesitant^1 as she replied—‘Oh Sages! You will laugh
when you hear my stupidity, stubbornness and ill-wittedness (“Jad-taai”). (4)
My Mana (heart and mind) has become adamant and it won’t listen to any
advice or implorings. It wants to raise a wall on water! [This is a metaphoric way of
saying that “my mind and heart want something as impossible as desiring to erect a
wall on the flowing water of a river or ocean, something which is absolutely
impossible. But what can I do? As I have already told you, my Mana is very
stubborn.”] (5)
Believing in the words of sage Narad, I am trying to fly in the air without
having wings! [That is, like making an impossible attempt to fly without wings, I too
am trying to make an attempt to marry Shiva without having the required
qualifications for it.] (6)
Oh sages, look at my stupidity that I am trying to become a wife of Lord
Shiva! [I know that what I am trying is impossible to achieve—i.e. to marry Shiva.
But what can I do? I am stubborn by nature; my mind and heart won’t hear reasoning
and logic.]’ (7)
[Note—Parvati did not wish to be disturbed. She had a hunch that these seven sages
will prod her to abandon her Tapa and forget about marrying Shiva as this is
impossible to achieve. In fact, this is what would happen soon. In their attempt to test
the sincerity of Parvati’s devotion for Lord Shiva and her determination to have the
Lord as her husband, they will try their best to deter her from pursuing this objective
of marrying Shiva and change course. They will go to the extent of highlighting all
the perceived negativities of character in Shiva and provide her with better options,
such as opting for Lord Vishnu who has fine characters, in order to see how firm she
is in her devotion for Shiva, how resolute her mind is, and if she harbours any kinds
of doubts about him.
Parvati was fully devoted and committed to Lord Shiva, and so she wanted to
pre-empt any nonsensical talk by the sages that would irritate her. That is why she
said up front that her mind is stubborn and her heart is not ready to reason. So the
sages should please better shut up!
(^1) Parvati was “hesitant” to reply. Why was she reluctant? She knew that the
persons who have asked her the reason for her Tapa were great sages and they have
already told her to speak the truth. For a girl to say that she wants to marry such and
such person is a bit difficult for her if she has to say this to even her father in private
audience, and here she is forced to disclose this secret desire in public, and that too in