What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

(Brent) #1

102 W H A T EVERY BODY IS SAYING


dominating their environment while being chastised by their parents.
This splay behavior is disrespectful and shows indifference to those in
authority. It is a territorial display that should not be encouraged or
tolerated.
If you have a child who does this every time he or she is in serious
trouble, you need to neutralize this behavior immediately by asking your
child to sit up and, if that fails, by nonverbally violating his or her space
(by sitting next to or standing closely behind him or her). In short order,
your child will have a limbic response to your spatial “invasion,” which
will cause him or her to sit up. If you allow your child to get away with
torso splays during major disagreements, don’t be surprised if he or she
loses respect for you over time. And why not? By allowing such displays,
you are basically saying, “It’s OK to disrespect me.” When these kids
grow up, they may continue to splay out inappropriately in the workplace
when they should be sitting up attentively. This is not conducive to lon-


Splaying out is a territorial display, which is OK in your own
home but not in the work place, especially during a job
interview.

Fig. 35
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