What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

(Brent) #1
KNOWLEDGE WITHIN REACH 113

BOX 28: GUARDIANS ALL

For exercise, I swim regularly at a local pool. Years ago, I became aware
of a young girl who, while normally gregarious and outgoing, would re-
strain her arms whenever her mother was around. I noticed this response
on several different days. In addition, I noted that the mother frequently
spoke to this young girl using stern, caustic, and demeaning words. In the
physical interactions I witnessed, she often handled her daughter roughly
rather than lovingly, which was very unsettling, but not to the degree of
being criminal. On the final day that I saw the girl, I noticed some bruises
just above her elbows on the ventral side of her arms (the part of the arm
that faces the torso when the arm is hanging normally at the side). At this
point, I could no longer keep my suspicions to myself.
I notified members of the pool staff that I suspected child abuse and
asked them to please keep an eye on the little girl. An employee told me
she was a “special needs” child, and the bruises might be caused by her
lack of coordination. I sensed that the gravity of my uneasiness wasn’t
registering, so I went to the director of the facility and expressed my con-
cerns. I explained that defense wounds from falling do not manifest on
the ventral side of the upper arms, but rather on the elbows or dorsal side
(the outside) of the arms. Also, I knew it was not coincidence that this
child looked like an automaton every time her mother came near. I was
relieved to learn that this matter was later referred to authorities, after oth-
ers at the swim facility made the same observations.
Let me make a very important point. If you are a parent, teacher,
camp counselor, or school resource officer and you see children severely
change or restrain their arm behavior around their parents or other adults,
at a minimum it should arouse your interest and promote further observa-
tion. Cessation of arm movement is part of the limbic system’s freeze re-
sponse. To the abused child, this adaptive behavior can mean survival.

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