What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

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130 W H A T EVERY BODY IS SAYING


food industry or the medical profession. Celebrities may be able to get
away with tattoos, but even they have them masked when working. The
bottom line on the subject of tattoos is that surveys show most people
don’t like to see them. While that may change one day, for now, if you
are trying to influence others in a positive way, you should conceal
them.


Arms as Conduits of Affection

Children need to be lovingly touched so that they can grow up feeling
safe and nurtured, but even adults can use a good hug every once in a
while. I give hugs freely because they transmit caring and affection so
much more effectively than mere words. I feel sorry for those who are
not huggers; they are missing so much in their lives.
As powerful and effective as a hug can be in gaining favor and
achieving interpersonal effectiveness with others, however, it can also be
seen by some as an unwanted intrusion of their personal space. In the li-
tigious age in which we live—where a well-meaning hug can be miscon-
strued as a sexual advance—one must be careful not to give out hugs
where they are unwelcome. As always, careful observation and interpre-
tation of people’s behavior as you interact with them will be your best
indicator as to whether a hug is appropriate or inappropriate in any given
circumstance.
Nevertheless, even without giving a hug, people can use their arms to
demonstrate warmth and, in so doing, increase their chances of being
viewed favorably by others. When approaching a stranger for the first
time, try demonstrating warmth by leaving your arms relaxed, preferably
with the ventral side exposed and perhaps even with the palms of your
hands clearly visible. This is a very powerful way of sending the message,
“Hello, I mean no harm” to the other person’s limbic system. It is a great
way of putting the other person at ease and facilitating any interaction
that follows.
In Latin America, an abrazo (a brief hug) is part of the culture among

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