What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

(Brent) #1
GETTING A GRIP 147

As a general guideline, any shaking behavior that starts or stops sud-
denly, or is somehow markedly different from baseline behavior, deserves
further scrutiny. Considering the context in which the shaking occurs,
when it occurs, and any other tells that might support a specific interpre-
tation will improve your ability to read a person correctly.


HAND DISPLAYS OF HIGH CONFIDENCE

A high-confidence display reflects a high degree of brain comfort and
self-assurance. Several confidence demonstrations associated with the
hands alert us that the person feels good about, and comfortable with,
his current state of affairs.


Steepling

Hand steepling may well be the most powerful high-confidence tell (see
figure 49). It involves touching the spread fingertips of both hands, in a
gesture similar to “praying hands,” but the fingers are not interlocked
and the palms may not be touching. It is called steepling because the
hands look like the pointed top of a church steeple. In the United
States, women tend to steeple low (perhaps at the waist), which some-
times makes the behavior more difficult to observe. Men tend to steeple
higher, at chest level, which makes their steepling more visible and
powerful.
Steepling signifies that you are confident of your thoughts or posi-
tion. It lets others know precisely how you feel about something and
how dedicated you are to your point of view (see box 40). High-status
people (lawyers, judges, medical doctors) often use steepling as part of
their daily behavioral repertoire because of their confidence in them-
selves and their status. All of us have steepled at one time or another,
but we do so to varying degrees and using a variety of styles. Some do
it all the time; some rarely do it; others perform modified steeples
(such as with only the extended index finger and thumb touching each

Free download pdf