What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

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GETTING A GRIP 149

in nonverbal behavior happen quickly and very accurately reflect and
define our real-time internal reactions to changing events. A person can
go from steepling (high confidence) to fingers interlaced (low confidence)
and back to steepling (high confidence)—reflecting the ebb and flow of
assurance and doubt.
You, too, can harness proper steepling and hand placement for posi-
tive impact. Steepling can be such a powerful purveyor of confidence and
self-assurance that it is hard to challenge a person displaying such a non-
verbal signal. Steepling is a very useful behavior to adopt; speakers and
salespeople should use it often for emphasis, as should anyone trying to
convey an important point. Consider the confidence of your hand ges-
tures when you are being interviewed by a prospective employer, present-
ing material at a meeting, or simply discussing issues with your friends.
Far too often during professional meetings, I see women steepling
under the table or very low, undermining the confidence they genuinely


Hand-wringing is a universal way of showing we are
stressed or concerned.

Fig. 50
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